Have you ever played Connect 4?  That game where you have to put round checkers in a frame to get four in a row? 

Connect 4

PICTURE: James Petts (licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0)

I always defeat my wife for the first three games, then I get cocky, and she defeats me in the next three!

Connect 4 is a good study of human nature. You have to get the balance right between concern for self and concern for the other.

If you concentrate too much on yourself and your own strategy, the other person will win as you won’t see what they are doing.

If you focus too much on the other and none on yourself, you might stop them succeeding but you won't succeed either.

It’s true for cooperation as well as competition. Balance the concern for self and the other to ensure you live a healthy life. 

Paul Clark’s musings can be heard on radio across Australia and at atthetop.org.au.